Sharing life with purpose and meaning is key to feeling fulfilled…and it is not dependent on age!

Some months ago one of my consultants called me because she  wondered whether we could accept an enquirer as a client.  The man she had just spoken to on the phone had  told her that he had met his recently deceased wife through the consultancy in 1977,  the year after I first opened our doors. After several years of caring for his beloved,  he wanted to meet someone who also believed life held more meaning when shared in a loving relationship.

While not unusual to have a past client seek to repartner through us, ‘John’ was exceptional.  Given the energy in his voice, my consultant was taken aback when he informed her that he had met his beloved wife he was in his late 50′s…and was now 93!  She was also  even more surprised when he added that we should email confirmation of an appointment as he was usually too busy to take calls after 9am,   As well as several  teaching and lecturing commitments that at times required interstate and overeas travel he said he was also studying for a PhD.  It was obvious that this man did not confom to stereotypes held re age!

Despite the many years that had passed since we had met I readily recalled John and was delighted to make an appointment to see him.  Back there then his positivity and zest for life had  impressed me greatly…and as a young woman I was surprised that  someone who had not completed high school and was close to retiring age had commenced study for a degree.

I recognised John when I went to reception to greet him.  Though smaller in build than I had recalled and somewhat hard of hearing, he had the same energy and enthusiasm for life and learning as I recalled.  He was excited as he told me about the positive impact his current research could have for many people and of his intention to work for at least another decade.   However, while he had good reason to look forward to each day, he was aware that he sorely missed the support, nourishment and meaning he had experienced sharing life’s journey with a loving partner.

Before leaving my office John gave me a hug and parting words that I’d like to share…

Life is not a dress rehearsal  It is up to us to make the most of every day! 

If you can put yourself in the picture, the insights from the diary entries below it will help you to relax and enjoy your relationship more!

Most likely when the man in your life is being distant it is due to the simple fact that when his mind is really focused  on  something, he is not likely to be aware of much else.  After all, he’s a guy!

There is no doubt that good relationships are the source of much of the nourishment we need to find joy and meaning in life.  Yet many of us these days are so caught up in the ‘busyness’ of life that we take the bonds we have with family and friends for granted.   

For most folk the festive season is one time of year when thoughts do turn to those we hold dear.  However, even then, all too often it seems we focus more on the pressures to do with gift-buying and giving rather than on sharing the wealth that is the caring we have for each other.There is no doubt that having people we care for in our lives is a primary source of our wellbeing. 

As I have mentioned in a number of items on this site, we have a biological need for our ‘feel-good’ hormones to be stimulated by such simple pleasures as touch, holding and being held, sharing time talking knowing we are being heard, being appreciated and appreciating. Yet so many of us are living lives that leave little time for us to really care for others…and, by so doing, care for ourselves. 

Resolve now to take time to give and receive such simple gifts of love and friendship each and every day of 2012…and the rest of your life!